Talking To My Zelph

My quest for freedom from the LDS religion.

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Location: OA, Offworld

Saturday, November 03, 2007

A New Perspective

When I was a TBM, I never worried too much about death.

Why should I? I mean, I was a member of the one true church on earth and as long as I played my cards right and did everything that was asked of me, I was destined for glory in the afterlife. Life itself wasn't very valuable to me because there was always the promise of an eternal life after this one.

I used to tell my friends that when I die, I wanted a party instead of a funeral. Funerals are solemn, depressing things and a party would be much more fitting for someone who was now in "a better place".

But now, I've adjusted my thinking on this.

Since I no believe in those kinds of promises and have accepted the very real possibility that there is no glorious afterlife awaiting me, I've come to put much more value on human life. The worth of every moment of life has increased exponentially. Each moment I have with my family and children has become so much more precious.

Since I have no proof that I (or anyone else) will live forever, I must believe that my life is finite and will someday end (a sober revelation indeed!) so I must make the most of whatever amount of time I have left.

Life is just too short to be miserable or to do things you just don't want to do. Like sitting in church for 3 or 4 or even 5 hours on a Sunday. Or "home teaching" a neighbor when you'd rather be watching NBC on Thursday nights (I'm addicted to The Office!) or working in a "calling" that you really have no interest in fulfulling.

I realize that there are plenty of LDS folk who geniunely like doing everything TSCC asks of them. But there are plenty of others who are railroaded into church service and activites because to say no to the prophet, sp, or bishop is the equivalent of saying no to God or Jesus himself (at least, that's what I was told as a church member.) But not me. I came to resent every calling, every assignment - anything that took me away from my family - even for a moment.

It feels so good to be out of that overbearing and demanding organization. Freedom never tasted so good.


Blogger Interested said...

What wonderful confirmation for my own feelings. I recently decided to resign my job, sell my house and move to another life to the fullest, one day at a time.

12:18 PM  
Blogger Al Jordan said...

There have been times when I've contemplated doing the exact same thing.

The idea of having a fresh start somewhere (anywhere!) other than Salt Lake City is very appealing.

I even made the suggestion to the Mrs. just to see what kind of reaction I would get. Needless to say, she didn't find it as inticing as I did.

I guess we just have too many roots here.

Good luck in your journey Interested. I hope everything works out for the best!

4:22 PM  

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